Beyond Casseroles

505 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend, by Lisa J. Copen

If my cat and grandchildren hadn't already convinced me that good things come in small packages, this book would have. At 4.25 x 7 inches, this is what I'd call a "pocket" book. It's small enough to put in your pocket or purse, but it's brimming with top-notch ways to encourage people whether they have chronic headaches, Migraine disease, or another chronic illness.

What a great idea for a book...

How many of us have been stumped when trying to think of ways to encourage someone with a chronic illness? Especially if you're also dealing with a chronic illness, it can be difficult to be imaginative and original. Ms. Copin says,

"Most of us want to express our concern when we see someone hurting; however, words seem so hollow. Rather than offering trite bits of encouragement that don't express our compassion, we have been known to procrastinate. Maybe we drop by her house with a casserole, but before we know it, weeks have passed and then months. We really do care but now we feel embarrassed that we didn't visit sooner or that we didn't call."

Sound familiar? It did to me too. Thankfully, Copen follows up by actually offering us those 505 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend. In addition to helping us come up with ideas, this book would be wonderful for someone who doesn't understand your illness as it has wonderful, common-sense ideas for spending time with someone with a chronic illness. (See the excerpts below.)

Excerpt from "Beyond Casseroles"

Courtesy of Ms. Copin, here is a sampling of 500 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend:

• Understand that she lives in a constant state of making decisions for which there is no guarantee that she is making the right choice. (#2)
• Don't make a person into a project. (#6)
• Ask, "What do you wish people understood about your illness?" (#13)
• Ask her to do spontaneous things, like go to a concert in the park, or just for a picnic. She may be more likely to participate since she knows if it's a good day or a bad day. (#22)
• Don't tell her about your brother's niece's cousin's best friend who tried a cure for the same illness and... (you know the rest). (#30)
• Don't wear perfume around her, especially if you know it can cause a reaction. (#126)
• Tell her what you've learned from her. (#193)
• Buy her a colorful flag for her patio. (#213)
• A charm bracelet makes a fun gift. You can add charms to celebrate events in her life that symbolize hope, survival, joy, and celebrations. (#257)
• Clip cartoons that will make her smile. (#304)
• When you visit, leave behind a little gift or note for her to find later. (#446)
• Make a soup basket with mugs, bowls, soups, crackers, and a note that says, "Your strength just bowls me over!" (#464)

Summary

"Beyond Casseroles" is clever, helpful, fun, and uplifting. You can use it to get ideas yourself, to give someone else a glimpse at what living with a chronic illness can be like, or as a gift. It could also give someone who has a chronic illness some ideas for keeping themselves more cheerful. All in all, an excellent little package.

About the Author

Lisa Copen is the founder of Rest Ministries, Inc., a Christian organization serving who live with chronic illness or pain. Living with rheumatoid arthritis, she understands chronic illness quite well. She is the editor of HopeKeepers Magazine and author of various books on chronic illness, including, "Mosaic Moments: Devotionals for the Chronically Ill"; and "Why Can't I Make People Understand? Discovering the validation those with chronic illness seek and why."